28.12.06
when you're in a foreign land with no friends and no memories, you tend to question the purpose of being there and how you will go about starting life afresh.
these questions can sometimes drive you nuts, especially when it's during the holidays there and you have all the time in the world to think about such things.
to keep my precious sanity (dad has this weird theory that all good fantasy writers and poets have loose screws coz they drive themselves crazy trying to come up with new and exciting plots. i suppose his theory is not entirely wrong, i mean i can name a couple of poets who are either gays, criminals or live in an asylum..except i cant really rmb any one right now. but no matter. fact remains that dad's theory made me worry about my sanity. i mean, i love fantasising and writing, but hell, i want to be SANE~!!), i have come up with a fantastic list of things i could do and think about that will keep my focused on my ultimate goal. or rather, God's goal.
of course, i have no idea what's God's purpose for me, but after a serious interrogation with myself and good observation of my parents, i more or less know what's expected of me by the ppl in my life.
they say we shouldn't live for others, and i agree. so i won't shortchange myself in any way. i want to do what i like and what interests me. so i'll find some way to squeeze everything into a frame that will satisfy everyone. or the majority. and hopefully that includes my Lord - but if it doesn't please Him, i'll definitely allow Him to change my will according to His and walk the path He has chosen for me.
but anw, before that day comes, here is my fantastic list that might not be so fantastic to you:
To Jenny:
Reasons to be happy and sane:-
1) You have chosen exciting and new subjects for the next two yrs, including media studies and japanese, which you have regretted 3yrs for dropping it when you were takin it.
2) You are working on The Magicator Bk2, which is coming along great except for a few minor probs that shall not be named here. It will be another exciting read for your supporters - few, yes, but supporters nevertheless - and you will be happy because they are happy.
3) You have found inspiration from your new churchie, stephanie, and you want to start drawing again (not that you ever did) - anime characters in particular. And you dream of the day when you can realistically draw out the characters in your own book.
4) You are now immensely drawn to taiwan idol series and are having the time of your life watching the shows on youtube (your first best friend now, rmb? and TP is your second best friend. dont you DARE forget that).
The list of shows you can watch is as follows:
=>Tokyo Juliet (currently)
=>Hana kimi (waiting for next ep to load)
=>It Started With A Kiss
=>Hana Yori Dango (jap version of meteor garden)
And more recommendations to come.
Oh, and you can always check out some animes while you're at drawing. TP, if you're reading, pls recommend some animes to jenny. you know she's a couch potato when it comes to finding resources.
5) Due to the idea of media studies classes and the possibilty of joining the film club in your new school, you have a new vision of your future, a dream that you only dreamt of. You are also intrigued by the works of the movie world and you know you enjoy watching the behind-the-scene works. You yearn to be part of such a team and so you hope to join the media industry in future. Hopefully, one day, you can write and produce your own movie or tv series. But you know also that your roots are still in Asia and you feel more attracted to its culture, and not so much of all that Hollywood glitter.
6) When school reopens in a mth, you will make frens with all sorts of ppl from all over the world. Unlike in nanyang, you will actually be able to meet ppl of other races and cultures. An inspiration for a new story might just come out from there.
7) You are feeling recharged and ready to combat the new term with its homework and tests. You have set your eyes on gettin a scholarship after 2yrs in your new school and that is also your dad's vision for you. Hopes are high, so are the stakes. You have betted your future on a career path that is non stereotypical. It might or might not work out and you could wake up one day in your bed, lose your passion, and realise you've accomplished nothing. So it's all the way with it, or nothing at all.
8) You are inspired by the culture of this new land and you want to do your best in all areas. You want to start practising your piano and take up dance classes, which is your one big passion that'll never die. And you also want to pick up the pen and start writing songs again. Chinese songs, obviously. You need all the practise you can get in this foreign land.
9) Because you want to do your best to keep up your Chinese standard - no matter how poor it is - you also want to try your hand at writing chinese novels, those simple romance sort, about high school girls and their unrealistic dreams. In addition to that, to your own disbelief, you are willing to start reading the entire history of China - all 5000 years. (yes, you did say that. at dinner ytd.)
10) You have never been down for too long and your friends in singapore all believe in you. You mustn't let them down. And your family too. You have God on your side and nothing is more powerful than that. You only need to ask and it will be given. You have found a new church with lotsa really funny friends who will give you support when you need them. A new life isn't a bad thing. You are standing on a platform that is one step closer to the life God has planned for you. So wipe those grey clouds from your eyes and put on a smile, you
bai chi!
------------------------------
hey that was pretty good. it's my best effort so far to reorganise my life. for those who dont know me well, i do this frequently when im not in the best of spirits. yepp, this is one very encouraging list for me. i feel i can live with this list forever. maybe i'll print it out and paste it in my room to remind myself everyday. then i'll always be smiley and positive ^0^
hmm.
... ...
darn. i was almost convinced.
tranquility ; 12/28/2006 12:23:00 pm.
24.12.06
things are definitely gettin better around here.
i've got my internet connection now, and on fri night, i earned my first buck while babysitting this kid of my dad's colleague.
jamie and i went together.babysat for abt 3 hrs, then spent 1hr watchin telly after he fell asleep.his mum paid us both 15bucks each, which was like whoa to us. coz imagine us not havin any pocket money or part time income. so ytd was really thrilling for us.jamie suggested we put our money together and get mum something. i think it's a brilliant idea. except i dunno how to get to the malls. transport is not so convenient around here.
suki is turning 10wks old on tues. his appetite is growing and so is his size. but anyway,have to start teacing him manners soon. he likes to play chasing, which drives the family nuts, coz we cant exactly pounce on him in case we crush him.
had a gathering ytd aftnn for with our neighbours. mum made a huge production out of everything - fat sausages, roasted chicken wings, salad, chips, potato wedges, smiley faces. but yea, we had good fun. i got to know Hannah,went over to her hse after the party and talked to her for abit. she graduated from burnside five yrs ago. it's pretty cool talkin to someone so into music and art. she does pencil sketching and sells them. im so inspired. now im even more sure i want to start drawing managa characters. i tried abit, and joyce says they're good. but you know kids. everything is good to them.
so anw,tmr is xmas. hmm. dont really feel anything. i mean,i know the true meaning of xmas and everything (i just came back from church), but still, shldnt we celebrate the birth of jesus everyday instead of just on xmas? so you'll probably understand why im not unusually hyped abt tmr, apart from giving joyce and dad their surprise gifts.
how many ppl actually love xmas becoz it's the day that marks the birth of jesus? some christians probably get that buzzy, loving feeling whenever it's xmas. but it only comes once a yr. so that makes it pointless. i'd rather feel the value of Christ the whole yr round, and treat xmas like any other day, than go through the yr feeling spiritually drained and then jump up and yell Hallelujah only when it's xmas.
hmm. i dont know. anyone can challenge my p.o.v? seems abit wrong to me, but i cant exactly put a finger on it...
so, yfers, did you guys have fun UBing? i heard abt the papaya game. sounds messy. but im sure everyone had a good time. the UB buzz will probably last a mth after it's over, but i hope the bond you guys have forged will remain for a long time. especially coco, i hope you've found some good frens who you can trust and confide in(:
SIXERS!!i didnt hear a single thing from those who went to china.hmm.does graduation equate to seperation?i guess so.i mean,no matter how bonded a class is,after we graduate,it's only possible to keep in touch with a small circle of frens. so im thankful i still have my Corner Friends.yes,TP,you and the other five.
blessed xmas everybody(:
tranquility ; 12/24/2006 07:58:00 am.
15.12.06
still.
after like a lifetime i STILL don't have a connection at home.like,the broadbrand and everything is set up and can be connected,but IE just doesn't show up.as in,they have those annoying words. THIS PAGE CANNOT BE SHOWN.sth like that.
so im here at the lib again(:
HELLO.
glad to know everything is still same in s'pore,boring for coco and sometimes thrilling for the cousins (mini and sx).i have a few major updates myself.
firstly,suki totally BARFED on my BED last night.and i was kind enough to let it share my precious bed becoz it kept yelping non stop in the pantry.i didnt want him to wake the house (which, i found out in the morn, wasnt a concern coz no one heard a single hoot in the night -.-).
but poor guy.his nose was all pinky and he had that "pls rub my tummy and make me feel better" puppy look on him.
yea,of coz,in case you're wondering.suki IS a puppy.MY NEW PUPPY!!!(((: im thrilled k.i've wanted to tell u guys for so long but there wasnt a chance since IE has dumped me at home.
anw.i know SUKI sounds kindda gay (as in,homo gay,not happy gay),but i thot it sounds really cute.it means "like" in jap,as in,
xi huan. And we really do
xi huan him, so we named him SUKI. In fact,we LOVE him to pieces, despite the fact daddy keeps calling him a nuisance for peeing all over the house, joyce screams at him often for chewing on her sch trousers while she was wearing them and i locked him up back in the pantry last night as punishment for barfing AND pooping in my room.
yepp.we love him.
i just pray he'll grow up into a sensible and loyal dog who will become the family's best fren.but wadeva.for now,i have to deal with his morning cries. oh btw,he's a pure bred border collie,black and white.we got him at a real bargain.200bucks. one pup like him usually costs a thousand.
*Note: If tiff or henry or any dog owner is reading this,pls tag and let me know how to solve suki's poop and wee probs. This is especially urgent becoz my house floor is carpet, so the liquid goes right in. Thanks.
Secondly,im so having cookin lessons now.seriously.all that cook-and-clean-up-the-kitchen-after-you're-done lessons.i've learnt how to cook fab noodles,proper fried rice,spare ribs soup,cook veggies etc etc.
i'll tell you how it all started. it's becoz of my mum's sickening fren. she commented my mum is a failure coz her daughter cant cook. like, hello? i stayed in singapore with jamie for two whole wks on our own and we survived.
and my mum got all insecure becoz of that stupid statement and got really pissed off in the kitchen when i ask stupid things like "do i put the egg first or the tomato?". so now i cook and help her in the kitchen for every meal. i cooked 3/4 of our dinner last night. which didnt taste bad. in fact, it was pretty good, even dad said so. but wadeva.
mum's an insecure middle aged woman. and im an insecure teenage girl who gets barf on her bed in the morning. end of story.
thirdly,i havent started sch yet,but i've found some new frens.but i cant get to know them better without my trusty MSN.not to mention i havent been in touch with sixers in china. lynn,jas and the lot.lost the stupid phone card and dunno their number there. as for you,dd,i realised since you flew off to NJ you havent once called me.
which reminds me,i need to let you guys know my new address. somehow. maybe i'll mass email, or tag ur blogs. but i certainly cant post it here. i'll also mass email my new telephone number so you can call or vice versa(:
fourthly,there's the issue of me finding a part time job and takin driving lessons (kids here can officially get driving license as soon as they turn 15!). and on top of all that, im thinkin of takin up dance classes again.of coz, there's still my piano. im left with one more grade to go. all these, plus i want to take riding lessons.
bummer.i figured i'd have to leave riding lessons till later.for now,im considering joining the tennis club,which plays every sat. there's really quite alot to do here but diff from what i usu do in spore.
movies show a lot later here. like, happy feet is not showing till xmas. and tix are incredibly expensive.so i cant just go off to a cinema anytime i want to kill time.
found all my CDs and movies, but havent found the video TP made for me.WHERE IS IT!!!? i darent ask TP to find some way to show it to me coz it seems the video is lost for good.hmm,may i suggest youtube? that's what michelle from yf did(: i really really want to watch the video she made.
lastly, we havent settled down in a church yet. we didnt go church last sun coz we went to buy suki. we drove all the way out into the countryside coz he was born on a farm. honestly, we PLANNED to get back in time to go to church,but time wasn't on our side. and apart from miscalculations of time, mum keeps makin new random frens all over the place and so we keep havin to make plans to go some other fantastic church her frens go to. not like we have to, but we all think it's a good idea to check out more churches before we make our decision. though the decision is quite obvious already. at least with me.
(btw, HOW WAS UB?? gosh i totally forgot abt it in all the mess here. but pls let me know how it went k!)
i really really hope to start attending church regularly again soon. my QT is going down like rain in the drain and i havent seen my bible for ages. my whole day revolves around running after suki, making sure he doesnt pee on the carpet, and picking up his poops.and if im lucky, i don't have to do dishes.
ARGH.
my glamorous life in christchurch.
tranquility ; 12/15/2006 09:23:00 am.
28.12.06
when you're in a foreign land with no friends and no memories, you tend to question the purpose of being there and how you will go about starting life afresh.
these questions can sometimes drive you nuts, especially when it's during the holidays there and you have all the time in the world to think about such things.
to keep my precious sanity (dad has this weird theory that all good fantasy writers and poets have loose screws coz they drive themselves crazy trying to come up with new and exciting plots. i suppose his theory is not entirely wrong, i mean i can name a couple of poets who are either gays, criminals or live in an asylum..except i cant really rmb any one right now. but no matter. fact remains that dad's theory made me worry about my sanity. i mean, i love fantasising and writing, but hell, i want to be SANE~!!), i have come up with a fantastic list of things i could do and think about that will keep my focused on my ultimate goal. or rather, God's goal.
of course, i have no idea what's God's purpose for me, but after a serious interrogation with myself and good observation of my parents, i more or less know what's expected of me by the ppl in my life.
they say we shouldn't live for others, and i agree. so i won't shortchange myself in any way. i want to do what i like and what interests me. so i'll find some way to squeeze everything into a frame that will satisfy everyone. or the majority. and hopefully that includes my Lord - but if it doesn't please Him, i'll definitely allow Him to change my will according to His and walk the path He has chosen for me.
but anw, before that day comes, here is my fantastic list that might not be so fantastic to you:
To Jenny:
Reasons to be happy and sane:-
1) You have chosen exciting and new subjects for the next two yrs, including media studies and japanese, which you have regretted 3yrs for dropping it when you were takin it.
2) You are working on The Magicator Bk2, which is coming along great except for a few minor probs that shall not be named here. It will be another exciting read for your supporters - few, yes, but supporters nevertheless - and you will be happy because they are happy.
3) You have found inspiration from your new churchie, stephanie, and you want to start drawing again (not that you ever did) - anime characters in particular. And you dream of the day when you can realistically draw out the characters in your own book.
4) You are now immensely drawn to taiwan idol series and are having the time of your life watching the shows on youtube (your first best friend now, rmb? and TP is your second best friend. dont you DARE forget that).
The list of shows you can watch is as follows:
=>Tokyo Juliet (currently)
=>Hana kimi (waiting for next ep to load)
=>It Started With A Kiss
=>Hana Yori Dango (jap version of meteor garden)
And more recommendations to come.
Oh, and you can always check out some animes while you're at drawing. TP, if you're reading, pls recommend some animes to jenny. you know she's a couch potato when it comes to finding resources.
5) Due to the idea of media studies classes and the possibilty of joining the film club in your new school, you have a new vision of your future, a dream that you only dreamt of. You are also intrigued by the works of the movie world and you know you enjoy watching the behind-the-scene works. You yearn to be part of such a team and so you hope to join the media industry in future. Hopefully, one day, you can write and produce your own movie or tv series. But you know also that your roots are still in Asia and you feel more attracted to its culture, and not so much of all that Hollywood glitter.
6) When school reopens in a mth, you will make frens with all sorts of ppl from all over the world. Unlike in nanyang, you will actually be able to meet ppl of other races and cultures. An inspiration for a new story might just come out from there.
7) You are feeling recharged and ready to combat the new term with its homework and tests. You have set your eyes on gettin a scholarship after 2yrs in your new school and that is also your dad's vision for you. Hopes are high, so are the stakes. You have betted your future on a career path that is non stereotypical. It might or might not work out and you could wake up one day in your bed, lose your passion, and realise you've accomplished nothing. So it's all the way with it, or nothing at all.
8) You are inspired by the culture of this new land and you want to do your best in all areas. You want to start practising your piano and take up dance classes, which is your one big passion that'll never die. And you also want to pick up the pen and start writing songs again. Chinese songs, obviously. You need all the practise you can get in this foreign land.
9) Because you want to do your best to keep up your Chinese standard - no matter how poor it is - you also want to try your hand at writing chinese novels, those simple romance sort, about high school girls and their unrealistic dreams. In addition to that, to your own disbelief, you are willing to start reading the entire history of China - all 5000 years. (yes, you did say that. at dinner ytd.)
10) You have never been down for too long and your friends in singapore all believe in you. You mustn't let them down. And your family too. You have God on your side and nothing is more powerful than that. You only need to ask and it will be given. You have found a new church with lotsa really funny friends who will give you support when you need them. A new life isn't a bad thing. You are standing on a platform that is one step closer to the life God has planned for you. So wipe those grey clouds from your eyes and put on a smile, you
bai chi!
------------------------------
hey that was pretty good. it's my best effort so far to reorganise my life. for those who dont know me well, i do this frequently when im not in the best of spirits. yepp, this is one very encouraging list for me. i feel i can live with this list forever. maybe i'll print it out and paste it in my room to remind myself everyday. then i'll always be smiley and positive ^0^
hmm.
... ...
darn. i was almost convinced.
tranquility ; 12/28/2006 12:23:00 pm.
24.12.06
things are definitely gettin better around here.
i've got my internet connection now, and on fri night, i earned my first buck while babysitting this kid of my dad's colleague.
jamie and i went together.babysat for abt 3 hrs, then spent 1hr watchin telly after he fell asleep.his mum paid us both 15bucks each, which was like whoa to us. coz imagine us not havin any pocket money or part time income. so ytd was really thrilling for us.jamie suggested we put our money together and get mum something. i think it's a brilliant idea. except i dunno how to get to the malls. transport is not so convenient around here.
suki is turning 10wks old on tues. his appetite is growing and so is his size. but anyway,have to start teacing him manners soon. he likes to play chasing, which drives the family nuts, coz we cant exactly pounce on him in case we crush him.
had a gathering ytd aftnn for with our neighbours. mum made a huge production out of everything - fat sausages, roasted chicken wings, salad, chips, potato wedges, smiley faces. but yea, we had good fun. i got to know Hannah,went over to her hse after the party and talked to her for abit. she graduated from burnside five yrs ago. it's pretty cool talkin to someone so into music and art. she does pencil sketching and sells them. im so inspired. now im even more sure i want to start drawing managa characters. i tried abit, and joyce says they're good. but you know kids. everything is good to them.
so anw,tmr is xmas. hmm. dont really feel anything. i mean,i know the true meaning of xmas and everything (i just came back from church), but still, shldnt we celebrate the birth of jesus everyday instead of just on xmas? so you'll probably understand why im not unusually hyped abt tmr, apart from giving joyce and dad their surprise gifts.
how many ppl actually love xmas becoz it's the day that marks the birth of jesus? some christians probably get that buzzy, loving feeling whenever it's xmas. but it only comes once a yr. so that makes it pointless. i'd rather feel the value of Christ the whole yr round, and treat xmas like any other day, than go through the yr feeling spiritually drained and then jump up and yell Hallelujah only when it's xmas.
hmm. i dont know. anyone can challenge my p.o.v? seems abit wrong to me, but i cant exactly put a finger on it...
so, yfers, did you guys have fun UBing? i heard abt the papaya game. sounds messy. but im sure everyone had a good time. the UB buzz will probably last a mth after it's over, but i hope the bond you guys have forged will remain for a long time. especially coco, i hope you've found some good frens who you can trust and confide in(:
SIXERS!!i didnt hear a single thing from those who went to china.hmm.does graduation equate to seperation?i guess so.i mean,no matter how bonded a class is,after we graduate,it's only possible to keep in touch with a small circle of frens. so im thankful i still have my Corner Friends.yes,TP,you and the other five.
blessed xmas everybody(:
tranquility ; 12/24/2006 07:58:00 am.
15.12.06
still.
after like a lifetime i STILL don't have a connection at home.like,the broadbrand and everything is set up and can be connected,but IE just doesn't show up.as in,they have those annoying words. THIS PAGE CANNOT BE SHOWN.sth like that.
so im here at the lib again(:
HELLO.
glad to know everything is still same in s'pore,boring for coco and sometimes thrilling for the cousins (mini and sx).i have a few major updates myself.
firstly,suki totally BARFED on my BED last night.and i was kind enough to let it share my precious bed becoz it kept yelping non stop in the pantry.i didnt want him to wake the house (which, i found out in the morn, wasnt a concern coz no one heard a single hoot in the night -.-).
but poor guy.his nose was all pinky and he had that "pls rub my tummy and make me feel better" puppy look on him.
yea,of coz,in case you're wondering.suki IS a puppy.MY NEW PUPPY!!!(((: im thrilled k.i've wanted to tell u guys for so long but there wasnt a chance since IE has dumped me at home.
anw.i know SUKI sounds kindda gay (as in,homo gay,not happy gay),but i thot it sounds really cute.it means "like" in jap,as in,
xi huan. And we really do
xi huan him, so we named him SUKI. In fact,we LOVE him to pieces, despite the fact daddy keeps calling him a nuisance for peeing all over the house, joyce screams at him often for chewing on her sch trousers while she was wearing them and i locked him up back in the pantry last night as punishment for barfing AND pooping in my room.
yepp.we love him.
i just pray he'll grow up into a sensible and loyal dog who will become the family's best fren.but wadeva.for now,i have to deal with his morning cries. oh btw,he's a pure bred border collie,black and white.we got him at a real bargain.200bucks. one pup like him usually costs a thousand.
*Note: If tiff or henry or any dog owner is reading this,pls tag and let me know how to solve suki's poop and wee probs. This is especially urgent becoz my house floor is carpet, so the liquid goes right in. Thanks.
Secondly,im so having cookin lessons now.seriously.all that cook-and-clean-up-the-kitchen-after-you're-done lessons.i've learnt how to cook fab noodles,proper fried rice,spare ribs soup,cook veggies etc etc.
i'll tell you how it all started. it's becoz of my mum's sickening fren. she commented my mum is a failure coz her daughter cant cook. like, hello? i stayed in singapore with jamie for two whole wks on our own and we survived.
and my mum got all insecure becoz of that stupid statement and got really pissed off in the kitchen when i ask stupid things like "do i put the egg first or the tomato?". so now i cook and help her in the kitchen for every meal. i cooked 3/4 of our dinner last night. which didnt taste bad. in fact, it was pretty good, even dad said so. but wadeva.
mum's an insecure middle aged woman. and im an insecure teenage girl who gets barf on her bed in the morning. end of story.
thirdly,i havent started sch yet,but i've found some new frens.but i cant get to know them better without my trusty MSN.not to mention i havent been in touch with sixers in china. lynn,jas and the lot.lost the stupid phone card and dunno their number there. as for you,dd,i realised since you flew off to NJ you havent once called me.
which reminds me,i need to let you guys know my new address. somehow. maybe i'll mass email, or tag ur blogs. but i certainly cant post it here. i'll also mass email my new telephone number so you can call or vice versa(:
fourthly,there's the issue of me finding a part time job and takin driving lessons (kids here can officially get driving license as soon as they turn 15!). and on top of all that, im thinkin of takin up dance classes again.of coz, there's still my piano. im left with one more grade to go. all these, plus i want to take riding lessons.
bummer.i figured i'd have to leave riding lessons till later.for now,im considering joining the tennis club,which plays every sat. there's really quite alot to do here but diff from what i usu do in spore.
movies show a lot later here. like, happy feet is not showing till xmas. and tix are incredibly expensive.so i cant just go off to a cinema anytime i want to kill time.
found all my CDs and movies, but havent found the video TP made for me.WHERE IS IT!!!? i darent ask TP to find some way to show it to me coz it seems the video is lost for good.hmm,may i suggest youtube? that's what michelle from yf did(: i really really want to watch the video she made.
lastly, we havent settled down in a church yet. we didnt go church last sun coz we went to buy suki. we drove all the way out into the countryside coz he was born on a farm. honestly, we PLANNED to get back in time to go to church,but time wasn't on our side. and apart from miscalculations of time, mum keeps makin new random frens all over the place and so we keep havin to make plans to go some other fantastic church her frens go to. not like we have to, but we all think it's a good idea to check out more churches before we make our decision. though the decision is quite obvious already. at least with me.
(btw, HOW WAS UB?? gosh i totally forgot abt it in all the mess here. but pls let me know how it went k!)
i really really hope to start attending church regularly again soon. my QT is going down like rain in the drain and i havent seen my bible for ages. my whole day revolves around running after suki, making sure he doesnt pee on the carpet, and picking up his poops.and if im lucky, i don't have to do dishes.
ARGH.
my glamorous life in christchurch.
tranquility ; 12/15/2006 09:23:00 am.
