12.1.08
", he's just a kid at heart."i apologise sincerely for my long, unexplained absence.
it is wrong, very wrong of me.
bad jenny.
i have been busy with college apps,
and have been going downhill for some time
but thank God things are starting to look up.
i understand that blogging is crucial,
it helps me update u guys whats going on here
and vice versa.
but recently i have felt God working in me,
and i have changed in my mindset.
before, i used to enjoy blogging because i think a lot and i need my blog as an output source for all those crazy thoughts running around.
i needed to pen them down to organise and get my head around them.
i have been praying for God to change me,
and now he has.
i still think abt stuffs,
but i no longer feel the impulse to write them down,
or comment so much on ppl and things,
even on myself.
one's heart and spirit are difficult things to judge and describe.
it's hard to simply say that someone is "good",
or "nice",
or "caring".
such words were invented by humans to set standards for each other.
they are not sufficient to truly capture the depth and vast sophistication of the heart and spirit of humans created by God.
so these days,
i speak less,
but i still see and hear and think.
i try not to judge,
and i would like to think im improving.
i have gone into the habit
of thinking quietly abt my past, present and future.
i like to think quietly,
and then sleep after that.
i do not come up with fantastic philosophies abt life,
nor answers to my qns,
but i still like to think.
difference is,
i dont rush myself now.
what is a few years compared to eternity?
God is the best judge of character,
so i leave all to him.
i just live my life in faith,
to walk each step in prayer.
p.s because you are such a good friend of mine,
and because this is a Christian-based blog,
i'll tell u sth i've been thinking abt.
recently i've been thinking abt the spiritual gifts of God.
every Christian has one,
so i've been told.
i wouldnt say im the best Christian,
but i would like such a gift from God.
i look at the list of spiritual gifts mentioned in the bible,
and i think none of them is present in my life,
and i dont feel i have them.
except for one.
the gift of faith.
im not sure though.
im really not.
and who am i to decide if thats my gift?
but i think thats a really cool gift.
i'll really like that.
and i'll pray for that.
God has prepared a present for all of us,
it'll be a pity not to ask for it and open it.
i encourage you to seek your spiritual gift,
identify it and acknowledge it,
then use it to bless others
with the blessings you have received.
google "spiritual gift" and lots of links come up,
there are even tests to find out your spiritual gift.
they may not be accurate,
and at the end of the day,
you have to feel inside your heart
to know what is your gift,
but still,
the links are fun starting points!(:
so yea,
all the best for the new school year!
tranquility ; 1/12/2008 07:32:00 pm.
